Hi Allison,
Thanks for contacting me, I can help.
First of all, I will be glad to tell you what I think in an email or phone call, for FREE. However, this is limited advice at best, because I have not observed the dog, his behavior or his environment with my own 2 eyes. That's the only way I can be sure of what is happening and best, most effective way to deal with it.
First and foremost I would stress to FORGET ABOUT where the dog came from and whether or not he might or might not have been abused before your boyfriend got him. That is all ancient history, has NO BEARING whatsoever on his current behavior and circumstances, and if you think about that and let it affect your relationship with him now, it will only cause problems. It leads you to humanize the dog and feel too much sympathy for him.
Dogs live in the here and now, and adjust quickly to new environments and new owners, etc. What your dog needs is solid, consistent LEADERSHIP. Sounds like he is bored, frustrated and needs ATTENTION. He needs interaction with people and an acceptable way to burn off his energy. If he gets no attention and has no positive, acceptable outlet for his energy, he is going to burn it off one way or another, and usually in a way people don't like.
Remember, this an animal we are talking about, not a person or a child. Solid leadership, and interaction every day with owner are what he needs most. A good long walk every single day will eliminate almost everything you describe. It will do so much for the dog I can't even describe it all in an email, it would become a book.
But in brief, it will allow the dog to bond with your boyfriend, it will give your boyfriend more control over the dog, and it will give the dog an acceptable outlet to burn off his extra energy every day.
Simply put, after an hour long walk to dog will be too TIRED to do any of the things you describe in your email. He'll simply rest up and be ready for tomorrow's walk. Also, with a walk every day, there is no need to 'escape' because home is no longer a life sentence in a JAIL. Even though it may be the nicest of houses with a big yard, if the dog never gets to leave it becomes PRISON.
After a walk every day, it just becomes a nice place to hang out until tomorrow's walk. He no longer needs to 'escape' because he knows he gets to experience life on the other side every day. Just imagine for yourself from the dog's point of view. If you never, ever get to leave the house. And each and every day the only person or people in your life leave for many hours. You'd get bored and frustrated very quickly, and soon feel like a caged animal.
Secondly, you have to consider how a dog's brain works. He doesn't want things, anything material you have. He doesnt want your house, your things, toys, a nice bed, nothing. He doesn't even necessarily want love, what he needs and craves is your ATTENTION. If he gets you angry or frustrated, it doesn't matter to him, at least he's getting a reaction and getting what he wants most, your complete, undivided attention. If he doesn't get it in a positive way, like a walk or training or just plain old quality time, he will get it any way he can, if it means learning to push buttons and make you angry, so be it. When you are really mad at him he wins, he has your undivided attention.
So my advice would be spend at least an hour a day of quality time with the dog. The best way, as I mentioned is a good long walk. If a walk is not possible on a given day, just do something, ANYTHING to engage his brain in a positive way and challenge him mentally. Throw a ball in the yard, play tug of war with a rope toy, teach him sit, down, stay, give me paw, rolloever, etc for treats. If your boyfriend runs to the corner store for milk or bread, take the dog. Take the dog anywhere you can as much as you can when possible or practical.
Think of a dog as a gas tank with legs and teeth. Every morning it is full and by night time, something has to be done to empty it. If you don't allow some positive way to empty it, the dog will find his own way - usually a way humans don't like, as evidenced by the behaviors you describe in your email.
In this case, I would tell your boyfriend to walk the dog not once a day, but twice. Before he leaves in the morning and as soon as he gets home. In that case, they won't have to be long walks. A much shorter walk will suffice. In no time, the dog will calm down and these behaviors will go away. Then he can turn it down to one walk a day after work or whatever, when he gets home.
The morning walk, at least initially, is vitally important to eliminate the things you describe because his tank will be drained and he won't want or need to burn off his energy in the bad ways you describe.
Another thing I would point out is that maybe the dog doesn't know what he's allowed to chew on and what he isn't. Take some time to point out EVERYTHING he is not allowed to chew on, and then take some time and show him what he can. Always leave at least 4 or 5 things around the house when is alone unsupervised - rawhides, pig ears, etc. So that whatever room he might roam into, he'll find something acceptable to chew on. Make a big deal out of praising him when he chews on things he's allowed to, show him that's desired behavior and reward him for it. Dogs often time don't even realize they're chewing, it's just a way to pass the time and get rid of some energy. And unless you take the time and show him, he doesn't know what is ok and what isn't.
Finally, to answer your question, there is no 'magic wand' that can be waived to make these things go away. It simply takes some time, effort, and patience and just 2 seconds worth of thinking about the dog, how he feels and what he needs.
Hope this helps and feel free to contact me again if you have more questions.
Regards,
Brian